I'm a Warrior Mom

I'm now listed over at Postpartum Progress as a Warrior Mom!

It's proof that I was and am not alone in my battle with the affects of PPD.

Check out my photo and info!

Which category is your life in today?

I realized today that it's been almost a month since I have last written. Most days I want to write, but my thoughts are all jumbled in my head. I have ideas but the words are a mess. I realize that this blog is for me, but since other's read it, I want it to sound at least decent most days!

What's been going through my mind most lately is the words that I would use to describe the darkenss of PPD. But to contrast that, the words that then describe the healing and strength that comes of PPD.

PPD thoughts -

darkness
dread
fear
aloneness
isolation
despair
no hope
exhaustion
confusion
helplessness

Healing thoughts -

success
strength
conviction
hope
joy
courage
bravery
security


Which cateogry are you in? Most days thankfully, I am in the Healing category. Some days thought I fall into the PPD thoughts category but the saving grace is - I can see it and I know that IT WILL END - THAT IT WILL NOT LAST FOREVER.

Today being one of those days. I woke up with extreme depression and anxiety today. It usually hits me in the fall when the weather changes. Waking up today to such a gray day hit me hard - realy hard. But I saw it and knew what it was. Instead of hiding, I took Ella to my moms, and I came home and made applesauce like a mad women. I KNEW that I had to do something, even though I was exhausted. And you know what, once I was done, I actually felt good. I had lunch, took a rest and Ella came home.